The Road to Hell is Paved With Bad Inventions

Well then, that's the festive season over and done with. You'll notice, of course, that I call it the festive season, not Christmas. This is so that I don't offend anyone.

Well bollocks to that, because everyone should be offended by man's second worst, and most divisive invention: political correctness. The only thing that Orwell got wrong was the year.

The signs were there though, even back in the eighties. My wife banned me from school parents' evenings for getting into a fight with a teacher who wouldn't let me say "blackboard". In answer to his accusation of racism I asked him why he considered black to be bad, and it all went downhill from there.

But our twenty-first century world is threatened by an unholy alliance between political correctness and man's worst invention: religion. God must indeed have infinite patience to tolerate the atrocities we perpetrate in His name. We used to have Crusades and Jihads, now we have institutionalised fear and suspicion.

So our Christmas cards now say "Season's Greetings" in case we offend Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Jedi Knights or other groups who really aren't that upset that Britain contains the occasional Christian.

Last Festive Season I walked into the studio on Festive Season Eve to find everyone wearing Santa hats. Everyone including Javed, a devout Muslim, who'd sent Christmas cards to everyone else in the company. To Javed, Christmas was an important festival commemorating the birth of a great holy man. To the so-called Christians around him it was a good excuse for a piss-up. Whose sensibilities are we protecting here?

We've already proscribed our national flag, and by doing so created a rallying symbol for extremist white twats. Every victory for political correctness strengthens their armoury and brings the Thought Police closer to power.